


Arrangements of the Caribbean

by Daegaer



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies)
Genre: Angels, Demons, Gen, Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-09-19
Updated: 2003-09-19
Packaged: 2017-11-05 15:13:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/407896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daegaer/pseuds/Daegaer





	Arrangements of the Caribbean

 

" . . . impersonating a cleric of the Church of England . . . "

Captain Jack Sparrow gave a little laugh.

"Oh, yeah."

"You shouldn't have done that, you know."

He looked around. It was just him and the officer up on the gallows at the moment, and the officer was too busy telling the good people what a blackguard Jack Sparrow was to spare the breath to whisper personal messages in his ear.

"Yeah?' he said carelessly.

He peered around in the direction the voice had come from. If he stared directly into the sunlight he could see a figure. He'd have thought he was drunk, only he hadn't had a drop in far too long. Or maybe he just had sunstroke, although that rarely gave him the impression of someone with a tetchy expression on his face, tapping a foot in irritation.

"Yeah?" he said again.

"Those poor young people. All they wanted was to get married so their fathers couldn't part them."

"Well, I married them, didn't I?"

" _Impersonating_ a cleric, Jack, weren't you even listening to the reasons they're going to kill you? And anyway, after you pretended to marry them you took the bride off for a quiet word and seduced her."

Sparrow gave his most innocent smile at what he still wasn't entirely sure wasn't thin air.

"And then," the voice continued, dripping with genteel sarcasm, "you took the groom aside for a man-to-man talk and you seduced _him._ "

Sparrow laughed, thought better of it, looked repentant, then gave up and laughed again.

"I meant well," he said, as he saw the expression get tetchier.

"Yes, well. Good intentions are hardly _my_ side of things."

"Speakin' of which, mate, where's your friend?" Sparrow said, looking round unsteadily. The officer would have to finish reading the charges eventually. He was surprised the man was still reading as it was. He'd obviously been a more notorious pirate than he'd thought.

"He's in the crowd waiting to see you swing. He doesn't like card cheats."

"I didn't cheat!"

"You put laudanum in his sherry. He calls that cheating."

"He was taking too long to get drunk, mate. I call it smart thinking."

Their conversation was interrupted by the hangman coming up and settling the noose around Sparrow's neck.

"What would you give to have another chance, Jack?" the voice asked.

"I'd owe you one, I reckon," Sparrow said, not much liking the feel of the rope.

"I suppose you would," the voice said. "Look over there."

Sparrow looked into the crowd and saw Will, a confused yet determined expression on his face as he came nearer. A tall, dark-haired man was by his side, speaking urgently in his ear. Will didn't seem to be paying attention, but Sparrow knew better from the odd fixed look in his eyes.

"Oh, Will," he muttered, "You don't want to be listening to the likes of him."

"We _could_ just leave you to die," the voice said idly.

"Listen to him, Will!" Sparrow yelled.

Will drew his sword and brought his arm back to throw.

"Remember, you owe us," the voice said, and the presence was gone.

There was suddenly only air beneath Sparrow's feet.

The sword flashed through the air, thudding into the upright of the gallows just where the dark-haired man pointed. Sparrow landed on it, finding his balance with an ease that surprised even him.

"Here we go again," he thought as he struggled not to strangle himself.

Damn, but he hated working for those interfering bastards.


End file.
